I wish I saw things more clearly, like how much you really meant to me and what I would have truly given to make you stay. I valued the wrong things, cherished the treasures which would not satisfy me in the long run. It felt as though a thick mist had taken hold of me, surrounded me like a veil. I used to say that I was blinded, but I wasn't really. I was just too afraid to give you everything.
This was my shield. My armour to keep myself away from you.
'Let me be,' I said, as you tried to catch me. You can put the bird in a cage but it will always want to spread its wings.
Watch me high up in the sky. Watch me from a distance. You're afraid of the fall but fear won't ever bring change.
I'm not the one I used to be. It doesn't matter how hard I try, in some people's eyes I will never be able to do it right. But I no longer live for permission. I live to fly.
And it is not that I feel like I'm safe and comfortable or that I believe nothing can touch me. I'm really just broken trying to pick up the pieces. I just felt lost. I felt like I lost everything, because the thoughts of others created my world. But no longer.
I will try to touch the sun. Foolish as it may be, I am convinced my wings won't burn. I've seen too much and I've said too little, but now my voice will echo through layers of time.
And if you see me reaching out my hand to the burning star, don't try to understand it, if you're mind can't comprehend. Just let me be.